I LOVE YOU DIE

Quills on Fire

I LOVE YOU DIE

“Is there something wrong with him?”

She asked,

‘How does a man so young live without love?’

She thought,

“I’ll make him love me, I swear I will!”

She swore.

᷉᷉᷉

He loved her alright.

In six short months, she had a row with him,

And drove off in a fit.

First was the runaway truck,

Then her faulty brakes.

She flew off the sides, screaming his name.

A watery end beneath the Carter Bridge.

Submarine Test…

***

“There must be something wrong with him?”

She said,

‘How does a person live without a heart?’

She thought.

“I’ll teach him to love me and only me!”

She swore.

᷉᷉᷉

He loved her alright.

On the eve of their first anniversary,

Her happiness and joy was cut short.

She’s a stubborn lady,

So were the robbers.

They gave her few choices; Money or Life.

Such painful death…

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Le Reconteur

Interesting musings from a favorite author

Quills on Fire

man alone

Man Alone…

LE RECONTEUR

I searched in the highs and lows,

I’m drenched to my back and brows.

I got to the ends of Earth,

And all I got was earth.

I traced my way back home,

Hoping to be alone.

And there he was;

Standing in a corner of Mayfair,

Where the silence was all there were.

All by himself, smoking his last cigarette.

On the same spot where we last met.

I said, “Where have you been?”

He said, “Ask me anything”

other

The Man on the Street

Angered I asked;

Where were you when my world fell apart?

When my days were bloodier than a broken heart.

You left me, lost and insecure,

In a world, dark and so impure.

Why did you leave me all alone,

To find my way on my own?

He smiled and said;

I’d never leave you if I wasn’t…

View original post 107 more words

One pot beef and potato stew

Ok so its been a while since I uploaded and I’m sorry but I’ll just have to make it up with this super easy mouth watering recipe that make our food journey an easy one.

This recipe is one of the most easiest things since sliced bread, I literally just dumped the contents into the pot and made use of stuff in my fridge that were trying to go bad after all I cannot spend 700naira on celery and watch the leafs dry up like 3month old Palm Sunday leaves. Besides I cannot disturb myself with technicalities of cooking with stress in this wahala of a country called Nigeria so I’ll begin my first in a series of many ONE POT DISHES.

Lets start

We’ll need

8-10 medium sized irish potatoes

6-8 medium sized carrots

2-3 cups of deboned beef

3 cups of rough chopped cabbage

3 cups of green beans

6 pieces of fresh tomatoes

Celery

2 cups of cauliflower

2 tbs of freshly grated ginger

2tbs of crushed garlic

Pepper (use your discretion, I surrendered my throat to the pepper gods so nothing fazes me and I used 2 large sized green peppers, 2 handfuls of the regular scotch bonnet or habenero peppers)freshly ground or blended don’t slice because we need to pack heat

1 small sized white onion

5- 6 small fresh red scallions (spring onion)

Your preferred bouillon cube-2cubes of knorr chicken bouillon cubes 1 cube of the magi crayfish bouillon cube

A jug of water

5 tbs of olive or sunflower oil and a good chunk of butter

Salt to taste

 

Lets cook

  • Wash your hand and get a large bowl to dump your veggies in because they are all getting a solid rinse in plenty water.
  • Get out your pressure pot and get ready to throw stuff in but don’t forget even in throwing there’s the chef like grace that we ought to possess, so we TOSS things in the pot. Starting from the meat that you just cut into bite sized chunks, next comes the potatoes that you just peel and cut into eight or six pieces depending on the size, then the carrots that should be cut on the bias into 4 pieces, then the beans that don’t even need the knife just use your hands to snap them in two or three or four, the cabbage,celery, cauliflower & tomatoes also rough chopped are tossed in next with the onions, scallions and peppers. I’m emphasizing roughly chopped veggies and not fancy knife skill because the cook time for this meal is actually long and we don’t want a pot of soggy uninviting vegetables at the end of the day.
  • Next comes the spices, now unlike my baking recipes where I’m always measuring and what not, I’m always scared of telling people the spice mix to use because you must have been cooking with something for quite a while so at this point you can always mix up stuff and add what you like. I added garlic and ginger and the bouillon cubes in place of stock plus a tablespoon of thyme and 2shakes of curry powder. At this point less is more in the spice department this is not a spicy beef stew (a new recipe for that I promise) but a fresh and easy meal so let the meat speak for itself. Drizzle the oil and throw sorry toss in the butter.
  • Don’t forget that you can always add and use whatever veggies are in your pantry some canned beans can be thrown in here for good measure.
  • Now just pour in enough water to cover the vegetables entirely because cook time is probably over 90 minutes for melt in your mouth type of meat and our pot lid is always o because HELOOOO PRESSURE POT besides, you don’t want to smell the burnt meat before the garlic.
  • Cover your pressure pot and forget about it for 50 minutes on a medium to high flame. Then I turn it off for 30 minutes before turning it back on for an extra 30 minutes. I’ve realized that this way the vegetables ends up looking glazed not with that dull uninviting look that overcooked vegetables have. Oh and that’s it.

When your pressure pot cools open it and portion into bowls and serve. To the cheese lovers, you can always grate some cheese into this or throw in some mozzarella slices per individual discretion, the heat from the potato is sure to melt whatever is placed on it, and you’re done. The best part of this meal is you’re only washing a knife and a pot now you can always lick your serving bowl clean, there’s always a first time for everything.

 

 

 

 

A LAZY GIRLS GUIDE TO FISH SAUCE, SERVED WITH BOILED YAMS

 

My beautiful people of God it’s another one of my –Icantbelieveitssoeasy- recipes. So don’t believe those people who say that because you live alone you have to eat like a pauper, sometimes surprise yourself with meals that have you amazed, now this lent I decided to give up meat and eggs so it’s been really difficult finding the right balance for protein since I don’t really enjoy fish, but I stumbled on a fish sauce recipe while surfing the internet and I decided to try it, meanwhile I had to Google over several variations and although I didn’t like what I saw, I decided to add my special twist to it. So here goes everything.

You’ll need

5-6 slices of yam (depending on how much you can consume)

2 medium-sized tomatoes

6 scotch bonnet peppers (please you can use less but my pepper radar is faulty)

1 ugly piece of fish

1 tsp ginger

I tsp garlic

2 small-sized onions (I used white and red onions)

1 bouillon cube

Salt

 

 

 

Let’s get started

  • Let’s prepare the fish; first off, I just clean the fish, remove the bones and the skin, don’t throw it out, just store it in your fridge, it would make for an amazing stock. Then I throw it in the pot with enough water to cover it, some salt, half the stock cube, 3 tbsp of dry ground pepper.
  • Bring it to a boil, then turn off the heat. Retrieve the fish from the pot, then using two forks break it into chunks or bits, there’s no need for finesse, in fact the more random the chunks the better, set this aside.
  • In a blender you can just throw the tomatoes and pepper and onion and ginger and garlic, although because I prefer more texture I just used my trusty grinder and made a beautiful mess of things and used my knife to finely chop the ginger and garlic but whatever works for you.
  • Now get a pan and pour in about 3 tbsp of olive oil, heat it up. Throw in the garlic and ginger and a sprinkle of salt then add the fish, we want it to fry and brown a little.
  • After about 3 minutes please don’t forget to constantly stir, stir and stir. Add the tomato mix and just about ¾ cup of the fish stock, turn it to make sure it’s not sticking to the pan ,then cover it for a bit.
  • Plate your boiled yams or rice or pasta, I’ve come to the conclusion that it really works best with everything.
  • Uncover your fish sauce and serve with your favorite staple, with a cold glass of water. Really easy right, I told you it would be.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Triple C chinchin (coffee, chocolate and cinnamon) crunch

For those who know me, I love playing with food, I cannot just make the basic meals Im way to extra for that so it has to reflect in everything I’m doing. Now chinchin is basically a fried dough/pastry / whatever. It’s just something that once you start eating its impossible to stop at a handful. It’s very common in Nigeria where I’m from but the ingredients are so basic that you can make them  anywhere. Me, I’m always trying to look for ways to use up leftover in my shelf so this was just an amazing way to.

Let’s cook

We’ll need

Flour – 6 cups

Sugar – 1 1/3 cup

Salt – 2 sprinkles (preferably done with pizzazz to show your extra)

Baking powder – 5/6 tsp (the maths I did to get this recipe serious looking is something you don’t want to imagine)

Eggs – 3

Milk – 1 cup

Butter – 1/2 cup (4minutes in the microwave and its perfect)

Nutmeg – 3 tbs

Cinnamon – 2 tbs

Coffee powder or Espresso Powder – 2 tbs

Milk powder – 4 tbs

Unsweetened Cocoa Powder or melted chocolate – 1/3 cup + 1tsp

Method

  • As usual with all my pastry recipes, dump all the powder ingredients into the bowl, this time I used a glass bowl so I was really feeling like a G, right until I remembered I had to knead that dough.
  • Now I created a hole in the middle because I found it easier to blend in the ingredients. So now I pour in the eggs and the milk then move it to a plastic bowl because you have to knead the life into or out of that dough.
  • You see this is really easy. Now I transfer this to my floured worktable, and then I roll it flat, as much as ill like to say 1/2inch or 1/4 inch or 2inch thickness I just roll it really flat because the thing would still scam you and double in size.
  • Now at this point I just flaunt my cutting skills by slicing the entire thing into strips that are like a finger wide and then cutting those strips into cubes, but this isn’t a norm, you can play with your dough at one point I even used my cookie cutter to misbehave a little, the order of the day is CHAOS.
  • Now I pour it into a floured tray to await the fryer. I get a deep frying pan (please don’t touch your nonstick) and pour about a liter or more into the fryer to make sure that the dough is completely immersed into oil when frying. After the oil heats up to 300 degrees, I just throw in the chinchin and let it brown for a bit, have it in mind that you shouldn’t crowd the pan, you actually need to turn it from time to time, after about 4 minutes in the oil or till it doubles up, take it out and let it drain in a sieve.
  • Let it cool before you taste it, I repeat, let it cool before you taste if not you would  burn your tongue because of chewy dough. By the time it cools it would be one crunchy and tasty snack.

The last thing you need to do for maximum satisfaction is to Eat it. Thank you. Don’t forget to share this immediately if not you’ll be stuck with an entire batch of amazing crunchiness. A glass of milk would be perfect with this, if you have the patience for it.

 

 

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The perfect weight loss guide for the broke Nigerian…….(part one)

Let’s talk about the realistic Nigerian diet that’s guaranteed to keep off the weight without you feeling like it’s your village people that have sent the gods of orobo to disturb you. Some things I’m convinced would keep the weight off and would go conveniently with the diet:

  • Quit eating after 8 o’clock, realistically I would have said 7 but assuming you don’t leave the office early, you still have to eat. On the days that it’s avoidable to eat late choose one of the dinner options with vegetables than the options with starch. That way you know the food won’t just sit in your belly.
  • As with any weight loss diet, the key is consistency, so try to remember that when your breakfast of the day consists of green tea and that yummy man from the office tells you to join him for breakfast or when someone is offering you chocolate and popcorn when you know it isn’t your cheat day.
  • Run away from red meat, instead for your meals use chicken that has its skin removed.
  • Green tea is your friend; I remember a period where I had just green tea for weeks without missing a day, the weight just refused to sit and boy was I glad about it. Even if its difficult to drink in the morning, pour into a plastic water carrier and drink when warm or cold. Don’t think to yourself that its costly there are some really cheap brands that give you your money’s worth in the market, but if you can afford the high end stuff, go for it.
  • Even if you’re allergic to exercise like myself *coughs* try to insert a long walk or run into your week at least 3 times a week, drag a friend along or plug in your earpiece and cover a reasonably long distance then reward yourself with an apple(I never said you should spoil your diet because you trekked)
  • Contrary to peoples belief alcohol won’t always keep the weight on, but beer is a wonderful way to achieve the big belly of the rich men. I strongly advice run away from the beer and instead pour a spirit into a tumbler and don’t dilute with those crappy soda drinks instead you could take some skimmed milk and whiskey or orange juice and brandy (squeeze your orange) or make your own sangria with some cheap red wine and some crushed berries and don’t forget plenty ice.
  • Lastly never under estimate h2o. I remember been told by my friends that I was weird for drinking too much water, but guess who’s figure is snatched now. Don’t always wait to be thirsty to drink and always carry your own water bottle with a lemon wedge in it or a peeled and quartered lime, when the water in it is finished call the sachet water guy and pour another one into it. At least 6 liters of water a day (approximately 8 cans of water).

Variety they say is the spice of life so I won’t be content with just writing one diet plan. So here goes.

Week 1

DAY BREAKFAST LUNCH DINNER
Sunday Vegan Indian samosa-this sounds way more difficult than it actually is but the good thing is it can be made in large quantities and store for as long as a month so you need not do this every Sunday and this goes perfectly with a cup of green tea. Smoked fish with a couple of boiled Irish potatoes. For the extra heat you could try a spicy pepper sauce. Summer tomato and carrot salad
Monday Leftover summer salad and dry wheat toast with your green tea. Yes there’s a rice day. So my famous white rice cooked in coconut milk and a mixed veggie platter (some carrot, cabbage, green beans, spring onion, cubed chicken plus tender loving sautéing) Even though I dislike beans, I cannot emphasize enough how amazing this protein is so, dinner is an amazing bean porridge with plantains. Don’t forget to take off the skin from the beans.
Tuesday Oats or Custard or Pap minus the sugar plus extra milk – skimmed please. Don’t forget your green tea. Yes we are swallowing- some wheat meal or unripe plantain meal with okro soup (hold the palm oil) do not prepare with beef instead some dry fish or stockfish would work perfectly. After that heavy lunch, we aren’t doing anything serious so we are making a lettuce and kidney bean salad with a lemon and chili vinaigrette.

 

Wednesday A boiled egg, green tea, at most four slices of wheat bread.

 

Of course lunch equals a salad and since we don’t want to waste or wilt our lettuce we’ll add it to a citrus salad with a lemon dressing. Another rice evening, amazing right. Well this is white rice and shrimp creole or basic shrimp sauce.

 

Thursday A decadent sandwich use low fat butter, no cheese, sardines that have been patted down   to reduce the oil, slices of tomato and remove the crust on the wheat bread. Don’t forget your green tea.

 

 

 

You’ll need some protein but don’t overdo it so some potatoes and a mixed veggie platter maybe break in the leftover fish into the mix, but don’t forget Portions! Portions! Portions!

 

 

So here is to finally eating red meat but done in minimal quantity. A one pot beef and potato stew.

 

 

 

 

Friday So a frozen fruit salad with milk or yoghurt poured over it would do you justice. I shouldn’t remind you but let it not be said that you left your green tea.

 

 

 

 

Some oatmeal and vegetable soup done the right way and not destroying the vegetables with heat. Yes you can gift yourself with a piece of skinless chicken.

 

 

 

You know the price for swallowing in the afternoon, calls for a very healthy dinner don’t forget tomorrow is cheat day, so a healthy apple, cucumber and cabbage salad a lemon and vinegar dressing should do the trick perfectly.

 

Saturday Cheat day but don’t forget it’s all about portions, a slice of cake minus the frosting or with slices of fruit some ice cream but fresh fruits inclusive. Yes you can hiss at the wheat bread today and get the good stuff. Don’t forget your green tea but you can spice it up with honey and lemon.

 

 

SCROLL TO YOUR RIGHT TO VIEW THE DINNER PLAN Continue reading The perfect weight loss guide for the broke Nigerian…….(part one)

The coconut pancake recipe that would change your outlook towards everything

So today, I’m really not going to dwell on the fact that just yesterday, it was impossible to log on here and it got really frustrating because that was the only reason why it was possible to have created this recipe, and while this one serves 1 very hungry man and a calorie counting lady, it could be modified to suit any number of people you might decide to feed.

So let’s get to cooking

Ingredients

Basically for this you’ll need

Coconut milk -1cup (coconut cream might do but maybe with a little water dilution)

Full cream milk -1 1/2 cup (this is a very hearty meal, healthy is in question)

Flour -3cups

Sugar – 1cup (I added an extra 1/4 though to sweeten things up a little- I have a sweet tooth-optional)

Eggs – 2

Butter – 3/8 cups (melted)

Baking powder – 1tsp

Vanilla extract – 1tsp

A dash of warm water

 

Let’s cook

  • I dump all my powdered ingredients (flour, sugar, baking powder) into a very cute glass bowl this time and use an egg whisk to make sure that it’s evenly distributed.
  • Then I pour my milk(s), egg and melted butter into a separate bowl and mix – I know more dirty dishes 😶😶- thoroughly
  • I pour this wet ingredients into the dry ingredients and mix thoroughly.
  • I wasn’t to happy with the thickness so I introduced the dash of water and vanilla, and my batter baby was a hit.
  • You would need a ladle to make sure that pancake sizes don’t vary so much and you would like to gently take a ladle-ful per batch.
  • I used a non stick pan here but a regular fry pan with oil would work. I used a little butter in the pan for the first pancake but it wasn’t what I was looking for so I didn’t try the butter and let my pan do its job.

And voila after frying the last pancake, make sure you get a decent picture before your friend decides you’ve wasted so much time in the kitchen. And you’re good to go.

Don’t forget to be a little bit extra with the type of food you eat after all YOLO.